Disclaimer: This post may include affiliate links. If you click one of them, we may receive a cute commission at no cost to you. Thank you.
If you’ve ever had a child look you dead in the eye while holding a purple crayon and insist they definitely did not draw all over the wall… welcome to the club.
Kids lie.
It’s almost like a developmental milestone.
First, they learn to walk. Then they learn to say “no” to everything. And right around the age of 4 or 5? They discover lying.
I used to think it was kind of funny—until my sweet, rule-following kid started fibbing about everything. It wasn’t just “I didn’t eat the cookie” when crumbs were all over their face. It was things like:
“I already washed my hands” (they hadn’t).
“I put my shoes away” (they were in the middle of the floor).
“I brushed my teeth” (their toothbrush was bone-dry).
At first, I did what most parents do. I called them out.
“I know you didn’t brush your teeth. Just tell me the truth.” But instead of making them confess, it made them double down.
That’s when I realized something big: My kid wasn’t lying to be bad. They were lying to avoid getting in trouble.
And that’s when I tried a parenting hack that changed everything.
The No-Blame “Try Again” Rule
Instead of immediately calling out the lie, I gave my child a chance to correct it—without shame, without yelling, and without making them feel like they had failed.
Here’s how it works:
If I know they’re lying, I don’t accuse them. I simply say, “That doesn’t sound like the truth. Want to try again?”
I pause. No lecture, no disappointed face. Just a moment for them to reset.
Almost every single time, they take a deep breath and tell the truth.
At first, I wasn’t sure if it would work.
But when my kid chose to correct themselves instead of digging in deeper, I realized what was happening.
I wasn’t just teaching them to be honest. I was showing them that honesty is safe.
Why This Hack Works
It takes away the pressure.
Kids often lie because they feel backed into a corner. If they think telling the truth means they’ll be in trouble, their instinct is to protect themselves. The “try again” rule gives them a way out.
It helps them build honesty as a habit.
If lying feels like a battle, kids will avoid telling the truth. But if they learn that honesty leads to better outcomes, they’ll start choosing it more naturally.
It strengthens your connection.
When kids feel safe being honest, they’re more likely to tell the truth about bigger things later in life. If they trust you now, they’ll trust you when they’re older.
Does This Mean No Consequences?
Nope. But it does mean the consequences are focused on learning, not shaming. Instead of punishing them for the lie, I focus on fixing the original problem.
If they lied about brushing their teeth? They go brush them.
If they lied about making a mess? They help clean it up.
If they lied about hitting their sibling? They make it right.
And I always, always praise them for correcting themselves.
“See? Telling the truth makes things easier. I’m really proud of you for being honest.”
Because at the end of the day, I don’t just want my kids to be obedient. I want them to be people who tell the truth—even when it’s hard. Even when they’re scared. Even when they know they made a mistake.
And that starts with me making honesty feel safe.
So if your kid has entered their “tiny lawyer” phase, give this a try.
It just might be the simplest, most effective parenting hack you didn’t know you needed.
