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If you’ve ever started your morning with a child screaming that their socks “feel weird,”
another one sobbing over the injustice of cereal, and a third just fully refusing to acknowledge that time exists, welcome.
You are in the right place. 😅
Mornings with kids are like trying to herd caffeinated squirrels through a tornado.
It’s pure chaos, with a side of existential dread.
But, after years of trial, error, and exactly one billion deep breaths, I have gathered some hacks that have made mornings at least 100 times easier (which is still only slightly better, but hey, we take our wins where we can get them).
So, if your morning routine currently resembles a chaotic game show where no one wins, try these:
1. The “Sleep in Your Clothes” Trick
This hack is the holy grail of school mornings.
If your kid has strong anti-getting-dressed energy in the morning, have them sleep in their next-day clothes.
Yes, Pajama Culture™ might judge us, but do we care? No, we do not.
→ Bonus: No more fights over outfit choices at 7 a.m. Downside: They might wear the same sweatshirt for four days straight. Pick your battles.
2. Breakfast on the Go (a.k.a. Embracing the Car Picnic)
Do my children eat their breakfast peacefully at the table, smiling and chatting like a Norman Rockwell painting?
No. They eat like wild raccoons that just found a garbage can of gold.
So, we keep “car breakfast” on standby.
This means portable, mess-resistant options like muffins, bananas, yogurt pouches, or a peanut butter tortilla roll-up (which is just fancy mom-speak for “a sad wrap”).
You’d be surprised how much more cooperative kids are when you hand them food while strapping them into a car seat.
→ Tip: If you have a toddler, keep a “crumb blanket” in the car. Or just accept that your vehicle is now a mobile trash heap.
3. The Magic of a Morning Playlist
I don’t know why blasting “We Don’t Talk About Bruno” at max volume makes my kids move faster, but it does.
If you struggle with getting little feet moving, make a morning playlist and time each task to a song.
→ Example:
- Teeth Brushing? “Shake It Off” (Taylor Swift)
- Getting Dressed? “Everything is Awesome” (LEGO Movie)
- Shoes on, grab backpack? “Eye of the Tiger” (because every morning is a battle)
Suddenly, it’s a game instead of a battle of wills.
4. Use the “When-Then” Trick
When kids get distracted, I use the “When-Then” method, which is just sneaky parenting manipulation.
- ❌ “Go brush your teeth.” → (Cue 20-minute debate about why they must bring their toy dragon to school)
- ✅ “When your teeth are brushed, then you can watch cartoons.”
It sets a clear expectation and removes the chance for them to argue (but let’s be honest, they still might try).
5. The “All Shoes By The Door” Rule
Why, WHY, do children act personally offended when asked to put on shoes?
And why do they disappear into another dimension the second you need them?
The rule: All shoes go by the door at night. If they’re not there in the morning?
Barefoot it is. (Not really, but the threat is highly effective.)
→ Bonus: Backpacks, coats, and lunchboxes go in one spot, too. Less time searching, more time pretending you’re in control.
6. Bribe Yourself (With Coffee or Silence)
I don’t know who needs to hear this, but your morning deserves a reward, too.
- Kid finally got dressed without a fight? Sip your coffee like it’s champagne.
- Left the house without screaming? Text your mom friend and brag.
- Made it to school drop-off without crying (you OR them)? Go sit in the car in silence for two minutes before heading home.
You are a warrior. Treat yourself accordingly.
7. Pack Lunches and Pick Out Clothes the Night Before (Because Morning-You is Useless)
Nighttime You is organized.
Nighttime You is motivated.
Morning You is on the verge of collapse.
So, Nighttime You needs to do the work: ✅ Lay out clothes
✅ Pack the lunchbox
✅ Fill the water bottle
✅ Pre-load the backpack so Morning You doesn’t have to hunt down library books at 7:45 a.m.
→ This is the difference between “Calmly leaving the house” and “Screaming about missing shoes at 8:01 a.m.”
8. The “NO Talking Until Breakfast” Rule
There are morning people and there are people who wake up furious at existence (kids are usually the latter).
Some of my best parenting advice? Ban unnecessary talking before breakfast. This includes:
❌ Debates about socks
❌ Requests for a pet lizard
❌ Complaints about the temperature of the air
Breakfast first. Words later. It’s survival.
9. Have a “Go Bag” Ready for Forgotten Essentials
Listen. Your child will forget things. And you will either:
A) Drive back home and ruin your whole schedule
B) Accept the chaos
Solution? A “Go Bag” in the car with:
- Extra socks
- Hairbrush & hair ties
- Granola bar
- Spare gloves (because they will lose them)
It’s saved us more times than I can count.
Final Thoughts: You’re Doing Amazing, Even If It Feels Like a Hot Mess
Mornings with kids will always be a little wild.
Some days, you’ll crush it.
Other days, you’ll send your kid to school with unbrushed hair and a questionable breakfast.
BOTH ARE FINE.
So, here’s to all of us just doing our best—chasing children with shoes, drinking coffee like it’s oxygen, and trying to survive until school drop-off.
May your socks be smooth, your coffee be strong, and your car seat snacks be crumb-free (lol, they won’t be).
You got this, Mama. 💪
