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Have you ever surprised yourself with what comes out of your mouth mid-meltdown?
One afternoon, in the middle of a juice spill, a glitter emergency, and a very dramatic shoe protest, I said something I didn’t plan.
Something that stopped both of us in our tracks.
Not in a “mom’s lost it” kind of way – though we’ve had our share of those moments but in a soft, soul-level, everything-just-shifted kind of way.
I said:
“You’re still learning.”
Three small words. No script. No parenting expert whispering in my ear.
Just a tired mom reaching for something gentle in the chaos.
And somehow, those words felt like a warm blanket tossed over both our shoulders.
The Moment It Clicked
My daughter had just accidentally dumped a whole cup of water onto her freshly painted masterpiece. Her bottom lip wobbled.
The frustration hit like a wave. And honestly? I felt it too. The urge to scold. To fix. To say something that would make it better.
But instead, I crouched down and said, “It’s okay, baby. You’re still learning.”
Her tiny shoulders relaxed. Mine did too.
A Phrase That Changed the Energy
Since that day, those words have found their way into so many moments:
When she gets mad and yells:
“You’re still learning how to use your big feelings.”
When she forgets the rules we’ve talked about a dozen times:
“You’re still learning how to make good choices.”
When I lose my patience, or forget something important, or feel like I’m falling short:
“I’m still learning too.”
And I mean it. We’re not broken.
We’re not behind. We’re just becoming.
Why It Works
This phrase opens up space—for both of us.
Space to be human. To make mistakes without shame.
To see every spilled cup and off-key meltdown not as a failure, but as part of the process.
It takes the sting out of “not yet” and replaces it with hope.
Because isn’t that what we all need?
A little hope that we’re on the right path, even when it’s messy and loud and covered in glitter glue?
Make It a Ritual
Want to try it? Start with a sticky-note reminder:
You’re still learning.
Stick it on your fridge, your mirror, your heart.
Better yet, turn it into a tiny ritual with your kids. Each night, ask:
- “What’s something you’re still learning?”
- “What’s something you got a little better at today?”
Let them see you reflect too. Show them that growing never stops—at 4 or 34.
So next time everything’s unraveling and the voices in your head start spiraling into not good enough, take a breath.
Put your hand on your heart. Say it softly, kindly, like you mean it:
“You’re still learning.”
And just like that, the moment softens.
And you both grow a little bit braver.
